As we moved through Cancer season, the season of self-care, I moved through some shadow work that redefined for me the importance of self-love. Not the narcissistic self-love that cares more about itself than about other people, but the kind of self-love that cares enough about itself that it won’t allow others to hurt, manipulate, shame, or guilt it. This type of self-love has been hard for me all of my life, but is something that Spirit has shown me it is time to work on in a big way. And one of the tools that Spirit gave me to do this is this self-love spread.
Tarot is a natural tool to help ourselves with self-love anyway, because it brings our inner truths out into the open. It puts us in touch with our intuition and our subconscious through the archetypes present on the cards. With this spread, we can work to become clear on specific steps we can take to work on loving ourselves, even those parts that we may not like.
The idea for this spread came when I pulled the Ace of Cups for my daily pull one day. The Aces are generally harder for me to work with or interpret because I have not had as much practice with them, but generally they call our attention to ourselves and our relationship with the energy of the suit. I have always viewed the suit of Cups as having to do with emotions, and my teacher Lindsay Mack teaches that it has to do with the heart and coming back to the heart. So much of our lives happens in our heads, and in order for us to reconnect with ourselves, find ourselves, and take care of ourselves, we need to come back to the heart. That is where our intuition lives, it is really where we live. It can be so hard to come back to that part of ourselves because stress, trauma, and just living our lives in today’s society can cause us to build a wall around our hearts and focus solely on our brains. But we do ourselves a disservice when we live like that. Science is actually proving that our hearts are very robust perceptual organs, and we live better and fuller lives when we put our brain in service of our heart. When we listen to our hearts and connect with our intuition, it causes us to realize that we have placed our needs below those of being productive at our jobs, being available to our families and others who need us, and all of the other ways that we get pushed and pulled in our daily lives. When we slow down and listen to our hearts and really connect, we lead less stressful lives. We can do the things that are required of us better.
They say that you can’t give from an empty cup. The Ace of Cups reminds us of that, to slow down and fill our cup first so that we will be better able to give to others. That is the essence of self-love, making sure that we are taken care of before we try to take care of others. Hopefully this spread will help you in your journey toward self love.
What a year this has been. I think we can all agree that with everything that has been happening during this year, it has been energy draining, to say the least. Personally, I have been moving through the year with a lot of fear due to the pandemic, and the energy involved in the elections is always draining to me.
In spite of all of this, my guides gave me a vision to follow quite some time ago. Due to all of the uncertainty and fear, it has been hard to follow the vision. I haven’t really been doing much of anything on a consistent basis. But it is time to change all of that. I am making a commitment to begin using my cards more because they are an awesome tool for figuring out the way forward. There are other things that I am committed to doing, but for now, this is where I am going to start.
1. What am I being invited to pay attention to in the week ahead?
Nine of Swords – Sit with yourself and do no buy into the bullshit that your brain is telling you. Your brain’s main job is to keep you safe, and in order to do that, it tells you things that keep you playing small, keep you working in the same capacity that you have been in all this time. What is your brain telling you that is keeping you playing small and safe? What is it telling you that you are using to prevent you from moving forward with your dreams? There is a lot of anxiety and fear out there right now. Don’t let the messages that your brain tells you keep you from following your dreams. What is the best way for you to be in truth this week?
The moon tells us that no one knows what is going to happen moving forward, least of all your brain. Your guides have given you a goal to work toward. You can be with the uncertainty of the times without allowing your brain to run your whole life. Surrender to the uncertainty and don’t allow it to dampen your desire for the future you have been shown.
2. What card can I call upon for motivation to reach my goals as I move through the week?
King of Pentacles – You have work that you are meant to do in this world. Your true self is aching to do this work. Listen to your true self. Let it guide you as you move through your week. Commit to doing the work that you are meant to do in this world, and realize that everything else is just a vehicle to help you get there. Let your soul guide you through the process of using the vehicle and moving through the world.
3. What am I being invited to let go of?
Knight of Swords – Let go of the thought that you can’t do this. You don’t have what it takes. The Knight of Swords says that you do have what it takes. It says that your brain tells you one thing about your energy and your heart knows something else. Sit with yourself and find that part of you beyond your mind that truly knows what you are capable of.
Aletheia tells us that we are being called to reclaim our truth. Live in that truth. According to the book, “Reclaiming your own truth is a way to reclaim your vital energy, health, and sense of belonging in the world,” (Krans, 221, Archetype Guide Book from The Wild Unknown Archetypes).
What is your story? What is your truth? Speak it to yourself and begin to live by it in a place free from guilt and shame.
What an amazing time of year. I can’t get over how magical everything has seemed lately, but perhaps that is less about the time of the year than about the journey that I am moving into. Whatever is causing this feeling of wonder, I hope it doesn’t stop. It is a very blessed thing, being able to see magic in different aspects of the year, of life, and of people, of nature. Being able to appreciate the uniqueness that they bring to the world.
This particular time of this particular year has definitely felt like an energy portal. I feel like something big is about to happen. Maybe that’s because I’ve been doing all of this work to create, and I know that the new year is when those creations will make their way out into the world. Maybe its because everyone and their mother in this community is talking about how powerful the energy is during this time. Maybe its because my own energy is shifting, or maybe it is a combination of all of these things. I don’t know, but I am loving this energy, although it can be a little overwhelming at times.
I’ve done a lot of reflection on this past year and a lot of mental preparation for the coming year, more than I ever have in previous years. Tarot has been a big part of that for me since I’m utilizing the Tarot for the first time in a consistent way. I’m also preparing for the birth of my project, so that leads to a lot of mental preparation as well. Because of all of this reflecting, I came to a very strong realization about the previous decade and the one coming up.
The last decade, the one of my thirties, was a busy time for me. I was going to school, working full time, studying beyond what school taught me. I created my own business and became super knowledgeable in my field. And as I thought on the decade and what I have learned about the decade to come, I realized that this past decade has been one all about working with knowledge with my brain. That’s where it was at for me. I read everything I could get my hands on about my field, I applied it in my classrooms, and I regurgitated it in my school classes. I used that knowledge to build up my business. It was all about the brain and what I could accomplish using it. It was also about using other people’s words and knowledge to try to build something unique, which can be challenging and sometimes feels like you are regurgitating someone else’s voice. When I had my business in that field, it never truly felt like my voice because I built what I did off of the voices of other people and the knowledge that they had also acquired from others. Such is the path of brain knowledge, perhaps.
As I have gone down this path, I have attempted to do it using that same method – the knowledge of the brain. I have tried to read the books, figure out what THE correspondences are, and find an ultimate truth to this path. But what I am finding is that it is hard, nearly impossible, to get anywhere on this path simply by using the power of the brain. It is impossible to get anywhere on this path by thinking about it from the perspective that there is one set of knowledge that is the correct one and that is the one that you must follow. This path is about a different kind of thinking, a different kind of interacting with the world. It requires an acknowledgement that, while this path is universal in its scope, people from different parts of the world have different truths based on their personal experiences. Hell, the person sitting across the room from me has a different truth based on their personal experience, even though we are in the same part of the world.
This path is about communicating with the heart, and using intuition and heart-centered knowledge to find your own voice in the midst of all of the brain knowledge out there. It is about finding what is true for you and using that to build something wonderful. So it only stands to reason for me that this coming decade is going to be about finding my voice using knowledge of the heart and my intuition. It is going to be about building my path based on that voice and not so much on the voices of others that have come before me. While their voices were true for them and can lend some guidance to my path ahead, this path is ultimately mine and can look different from someone else’s path.
Heart knowledge also requires us to slow down, something that I have been in desperate need of. Working from the brain, especially in our capitalistic system, requires us to move faster and push harder. It’s all about the grind, how much we can produce and how productive we are. People become faceless as they are thought of as “the consumer” or “the customer.” The world around us becomes a source of materials for the work that we do. Heart knowledge requires us to slow down and listen, not just with our ears, but with our intuition and our heart. It requires us to get in touch with ourselves on a more intimate level, not just looking at ourselves from a brain-based space (perhaps more on what that means in a later post), but really getting to know ourselves on a deeper level. It also requires us to get to know others on that same level, to listen to them between the lines and reach out our hearts to them to truly feel them. It means slowing down and listening to nature, to really perceive what is going on around us with our plant and stone allies right in our own neighborhoods, as well as on paths in wooded areas. It requires us to truly connect with others, something that seems to get harder and harder as we move through this age of technology and consumerism.
So this is why this new decade feels so powerful to me. This is the energy that I am going to be working with this year, and probably beyond that throughout the decade. Through interacting with the world from this heart space, I will be able to create a space to work that is much truer to myself than the one I worked in during the previous decade, one that can resonate more with others because we are interacting on a different level than I have with others in the previous decade. And THE voice will be my voice, a voice truer than one of the past because it will not be clouded with the voices of others. Enhanced, maybe. But not clouded.