I’ve been super anxious ever since yesterday afternoon when my boss texted me about a staff meeting that my job is having on Thursday. I have actually been laid off since the end of March, but my presence was requested at this meeting. The anxiety set it because in my mind a meeting where my presence is requested could only mean one of two things: either their Payroll Protection loan was approved, which means I would have to go back to work (which I am not keen on – I was just super sick in January and honestly I’m living in a place of fear when it comes to the Coronavirus); or the executive director has decided that she can no longer afford to stay open given the current circumstances, and therefore I will be out of a job. These options are my fear-based brain talking, because there is a third option: the yearly paperwork we are required to keep on file on all staff is coming up due and we need to fill out and file new paperwork.
I pulled a Tarot card for the day, something that I desperately need to get in the habit of doing more often, and I probably will. Just in the past week I have been developing a relationship with my deck that I haven’t had before, simply because I have taken the initiative to learn more about Tarot and spend more time with my deck. Today I pulled the Ten of Cups, which tells me to spend time enjoying what is right here and now, instead of worrying about what is coming in the future. We just moved into a great apartment, I have time to read and study and write, and I will continue to have this time until I do have to go back to work. There is no guarantee that the meeting will call me back to work or that I will permanently lose my job, but I can enjoy the time I have right now in this moment.
The Ten of Cups is a happy card, with a couple in the foreground admiring the rainbow in the sky, their arms outstretched as they gaze upon it. Children happily play behind them. A cozy house is in the background. The couple is standing next to a river or stream, which in a lot of cards symbolizes a healing, or another realm. The couple is firmly in this realm, though, enjoying what they have in the here and now.
The Ten of Cups reminds us to be present and to enjoy our lives. Even when things are difficult or when we are living in fear, there are positives all around us. If we live with families we can take extra time to enjoy what each person adds to our family unit. If we are alone, we can have gratitude for the attention and care we can give to ourselves. If we are essential and are unable to shelter in place, we can find positive moments throughout our day with our coworkers. I know that there are as many different situations out there as there are people, and I know that I’m not covering hardly any of them, but the point is to stay grounded and find the positives no matter what your particular situation is.
So what is this card bringing up for you? How are you grounding yourself and focusing on the positives in this time when it seems like there are negatives all around us? Let me know in the comments.